Okay. So. We’re back at the start of a new year and new goals and new things to look forward to.
December was… hard. And not for any real good reason either. I’ve had an outpatient procedure done which I hope will help me and its spurred a two month trial of sorts to see if that will help in my goal to lose weight. Before you all get cranky with me, it wasn’t a weight loss procedure, it was a… hormonal one…
Weight wise, I’m back to where I was and I’m not quite happy about that. But given that I’ve had absolutely no luck losing weight with the implant but only succeeded in gaining weight, I think that with it removed I might be able to get better success?
I’m hopeful anyway. I’m planning on going back to Weight Watchers Meetings, rather then just doing it online. I’ll be tracking and exercising better and hopefully posting a lot more recipes as I’m cooking for only one now and on a stricter budget.
This is my New Years Resolution, not to lose weight (thought that is a hopeful side effect) but to get back into the method of Weight Watchers.
I really want to lose weight. I want to lose it and I have worked really hard to get my mind wrapped around the idea of losing weight.
But lately I have had the hardest time doing this. I know that there are underlying issues for this, and these are things that I’m also working on, but right now I cannot for the life of me concentrate on losing weight. And that breaks my heart, because it’s practically the one thing in my life that I can control and that control has been wrest from my grip. And I hate that.
So I just need you to know that I might not be posting here even weekly for a while. I need to figure it out and how I can move forward and hopefully, not gain to much weight in the meanwhile.
OKAY So. Yeah. I’ve been silent the last few weeks. Unsurprisingly, I gained 2.4 pounds since last we spoke, given the dual Thanksgiving dinners, but it wasn’t quite as bad as I think it could have been.
I’ve taken to going to the gym more frequently (Friday/Saturday and this morning) and today I’m detoxing it out. So no caffeine, sugar or carbs at all today. My hope is that I’ll be able to do it with
It shall be a struggle, but I will en-devour not to partake. But I have flavored teas, none of which have sugars pre-added in to them. So this is good for me.
As I weighed myself this morning I had the unfortunate pleasure of looking in the mirror as I did it and it was just not a fun thing for me. I’m not a huge fan of the way my body looks. The whole image of me sans-clothing is not great. I feel like I look much better with clothes on, which is depressing and something that I’m really trying to work with in my mind.
But that said, I’ve also decided that it is a new month, and the start of a new week, so as has become a grand tradition on this blog, I’m starting over. And thats for everything from the diet to my budgeting.
All that said its become very clear to me that I need to have something for myself that isn’t volunteering and that I need someone to talk to that is going to be impartial about me and maybe tell me why I can’t stick with a diet…